Hi singles, and friends of singles! Have you ever questioned if you are with “the one”? Or maybe you’re dating someone and he seems perfect, but you just don’t know if God has brought you this man.
I’m going to show you the 4 steps I took when deciphering if Michael was “the one!” What were the signs that God gave me and what made it clear to me. And I’l also like to let you know that this doesn’t JUST apply to singles. If you’re struggling with any kind of decision now, this will help you, too.
Check out some of my recent posts related to this topic:
You may not know this about me, but I considered myself a professional single for a long time. I did not meet my husband until I was in my 40s. No matter what age you are, don’t be discouraged, because God has a reason for your singleness. God’s not putting you through this time of singleness for no reason!
Maybe God is trying to teach you something, maybe he’s preparing your future soulmate, but it could just be, “our timing is not God’s timing.” Start looking at the signs that God may be giving you. You might just need to come out and ask God, “Please, show me what I need to learn from this. Teach me something.”
Finding THE ONE – God First
The most important step we must take is putting God first!! He has to be your number one priority or you may not ever find “the one”!! You may find the “he’ll do” but NOT the one God has chosen for you. If we don’t put our Heavenly Father first in ALL things, how can we expect to find the spouse God has picked out for you?
A little background on moi…for me, I was definitely a strong believer, but God was not the priority. My priority was finding a husband, where is my husband? Why is he not here? That was my priority, that’s all I could focus on all the time. As a dating woman, I was always asking myself, “Is this the one? ”
That was how I spent my days, focusing on where is my husband? And why didn’t God bring him to me? And yes I would pray to God and ask Him where my husband was, BUT, God surely wasn’t my priority. Finding a husband became my idol, that was what I was focusing on. I actually wrote a blog post: What Idols are You Putting Before God A husband was what I was focusing on and spending all of my energy on.
I also wrote a book about the time I finally realized that I needed to stop that and focus all my energy on God: But First, Pray
When I finally realized what I was doing, I knew I needed to make a huge change and that began a new journey with the Lord. Boy did my life do a complete 180!
I quickly learned that I needed to make a big change; get up early, spend time in prayer daily and just spend quality time making God, Lord of my life.
First and foremost, you need to make that decision, too. You need to spend that time with Him everyday and not just when you feel like it or are going through a rough time; DAILY!!
Finding THE ONE – The Word
Our second tip is to get in His Word! Spend time in the Word daily. I know that seems like a lot, and I know trying to fit God in every day is overwhelming for you busy ladies. I wrote two blog posts on this; these should really help you learn to make that time a priority, yet not take up your whole day:
Don’t just do what I used to do and only read devotionals. Devotionals are great, but we need God’s Word. If you have a good devotional, like Jesus Calling, there are Bible verses included in each day’s reading, so this is a good way to get God’s Word in; open up your bible and research that verse.
God’s Word is His guide for our lives. It’s how God speaks to us.
One of the easy ways to get His word in is to read one Psalm or Proverbs per day. They’re not long and it’s a great way to start.
Finding THE ONE – Listening to Others
Listening to others can happen in a variety of ways. This can be your own friends, as long as they’re giving you Godly advice, church, bible study, worship music, sermon or podcast or just hanging out with your friends. I do want to emphasize how important it is to have good godly girlfriends in your life. Get involved in your church, join a Bible study, however you need to find some good Christian girlfriends, I highly recommend this. They’re going to give you advice that God speaks to them; they’ll be truly looking out for you in a way that others might now.
I know this firsthand and I’ll share with you exactly how God spoke to me (watch YouTube video below.) When God is gonna tell you something, He will say this to you over and over and over again. It’s as if He’s hitting you over the head!
When I first met Michael and really had no idea if we were even a “couple,” God began to show me 2 Bible verses, over and over again. (check out my video at the end of this blog post; I got into a lot more detail about meeting my man) One Bible story was the Ruth and Boaz one, make sure you go read that: Book of Ruth. And then this is the verse God constantly put in front of me:
That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh. Genesis 2:24
Both of those came to be about 3-4 times over and over again! This is why it’s so important to pay attention to these little signs; I heard it through sermons, Bible readings, and Bible study. God is trying to get your attention and we need His wisdom to understand what He’s saying to us.
Finding THE ONE – Journaling
My last tip is to start JOURNALING. If you just don’t know where to start, I wrote a blog post on this, too! How to Reach God through Journaling
I’ve got a great story about this one, too. We recently moved and I found the journal I was writing in when I met Michael. The great thing about finding that is seeing all the many ways God was answering my many prayers and I just didn’t see it. I prayed for the exact man I wanted God to bring me and Michael is that and MORE!! And the funny thing is, as I was writing that, I had literally just met Michael, yet I was so heartbroken from the last guy, I was clueless.
Journaling your prayers, your bible verses, what you’re going through, your emotions, what you think God might be saying to you, etc… It’s such a great way to see what God’s saying to you. He may be giving you so many signs, yet you just don’t see them. It was because of my journal, I was able to write in there about hearing the Ruth and Boaz story 4x’s and it hit me, God is really trying to tell me something. Then I was able to see how the verse in Genesis constantly kept appearing to me and God was basically hitting me over the head!! He had to use 2 parts of the Bible to get my attention.
I can’t express enough how great journaling is for “hearing” from God.
And all of these steps truly showed me how amazing this hubby of mine is!! So truly blessed!!
You’ve probably heard this before, that when you meet the one, you will know. It is 100% TRUE! I didn’t believe it at first, but once I was able to look through all of those 4 steps I gave you, I saw how God was making it very clear to me that Michael was THE ONE!!
If you are questioning your current relationship at all, it’s probably not the right one. If you are making excuses for this person and you’re saying, “But he’s a great guy. But he treats me pretty good. I’m not gonna find any better, I’m in my 40s, 50s, 60s. He goes to church. Or he’s willing to go to church,” whatever it is. I have made all of these excuses. If you have to make excuses, or question the relationship AT ALL, it’s probably not the one.
You WILL KNOW! God’s gonna make it clear, and he’s gonna hit you over the head with it like he did me.
Make sure you watch my video below because I go into a lot more details on how I met Michael and how it was NOT love at first site!!!
And let me know how you knew you had found “the one” Or maybe you need prayers because you’re just not sure about your current relationship. Always here to help!!
I’ve got an awesome FREE GIFT for you, just for being my friend!! This will help you get started with Journaling. Get your FREE Guided Journal HERE!
Have you joined my FREE online community of God’s Gals? Join Here!